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September 2, 2015
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I thought you all would get a laugh out of this.
Just a little bit of info. My wife and I are both smart asses and give each other a hard time quite a bit. She is also an accountant so any extra spending is sometimes met with "let me look and see if it's in the budget" 
Okay now for the story:
We are driving home after picking up some pizza through an area we don't travel very often and realize I am getting pulled over. Officer was very nice, polite and did give me a ticket. We pull onto the road and continue on to the house.
Me: Sorry, babe.
Wife: It's okay, it'll just come out of your gun fund.
Me: WHA? I have a gun fund. (actually excited to hear I have one)
Wife: Well not now, it's in the negative.
Wife 1 - Me 0
Dans Club
March 2, 2008
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GOOD DEAL 
You now officially have a Gun Fund. Time to learn the rules and build your balance. Flowers, not forgetting her birthday, your anniversary, spontaneous weekend picnics, go to a concert, make dinner once a week, and for God's sake, do not fail to notice a new hairdo.
From the tenor of your post, you already get how this works.
Suggestions from any other fellow travelers would be welcome.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman "Were is the Self Help Section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
George Carlin
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Dans Club
February 22, 2009
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Forget flowers for an occasion; just pick some up one day "just because...".
Technically, the glass is always full; half liquid, half air....
Dans Club
March 2, 2008
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rwsem said
Forget flowers for an occasion; just pick some up one day "just because...".
Advice from an EXPERT
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman "Were is the Self Help Section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
George Carlin
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Dans Club
February 22, 2009
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Drop her off for a Salon day...
Technically, the glass is always full; half liquid, half air....
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Range Officer
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July 2, 2011
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rwsem said
Drop her off for a Salon day...
You want BIG points? Make that a SPA day!
To the paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers:
if you find one...what's your plan?
Dans Club
March 2, 2008
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And there's a lot of value in the spontaneous "I was just thinking how much I love you" in the middle of the football game that you are watching.
I need to add, it's pretty important to actually LOVE her, and show that every day.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman "Were is the Self Help Section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
George Carlin
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Dans Club
February 22, 2009
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OOOhhhhh, ohhh, oohh; a football game- you don't even care about! Act like you want to watch it, then at halftime; switch it to Hallmark Channel. And yes, Steve's second point is pretty important too.
Technically, the glass is always full; half liquid, half air....
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Dans Club
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July 2, 2011
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Best football trick. Your team has bye week. Settle in like normal. You know.... beer, peanuts, chips, dip the works. Observe her wandering around. Turn off the TV, get up and say, what do YOU want to do today honey?
To the paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers:
if you find one...what's your plan?
September 2, 2015
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HAHAHA Notes taken! Thank you! I have been known to do some spontaneous stuff, but a whole just take and surprise with a spa day is great.
The football game trick is GREAT!!!! HAHAHA
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Dans Club
March 25, 2013
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And watch a chick flick with her. That is always sure to make them gratefull. My wife is badgering me to give her my new Sig 938. I can probably parlay that into at least 2 dan revolvers or a 1911.
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July 2, 2011
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Here's the real biggie. I've never been able to do it. Surrender the remote completely for one entire night of TV viewing and DO NOT leave the room. If you can do it well.....
To the paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers:
if you find one...what's your plan?
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Dans Club
March 25, 2013
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Do you have to stay awake too?
February 20, 2008
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brucertx said
Here's the real biggie. I've never been able to do it. Surrender the remote completely for one entire night of TV viewing and DO NOT leave the room. If you can do it well.....
^^^This is SOP for many of us...after 36 years, just keep her happy.
If you're going to drink, don't drive. Don't even putt.
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July 2, 2011
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Ole Dog said
Do you have to stay awake too?
Yes, and look interested in her programming choices. You may even be called upon to discuss certain plot twists.
To the paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers:
if you find one...what's your plan?
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July 2, 2011
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brucertx said
Ole Dog said
Do you have to stay awake too?Yes, and look interested in her programming choices. You may even be called upon to discuss certain plot twists.
Explains why I'm single...well one of of many reasons to sure!
To the paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers:
if you find one...what's your plan?
Dans Club
March 2, 2008
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brucertx said
Ole Dog said
Do you have to stay awake too?Yes, and look interested in her programming choices. You may even be called upon to discuss certain plot twists.
You get extra points for spontaneous comments like "WOW, I never saw that coming"
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman "Were is the Self Help Section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
George Carlin
September 2, 2015
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HAHAHA I'm taking notes, but the remote for the whole night.......can I have a scotch or beer to help?
We saw a commercial for a show/special coming on next week and she said "oh, that might be interesting" something I would not care to watch and on a Monday (Bears and Chargers) thankfully this is a game I can miss. I may have to use the trick rwsem mentioned above. Turn the game on and a little into it go 'hey, isn;t that show on you wanted to watch?' and turn to it.
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July 2, 2011
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Kaseyart said
HAHAHA I'm taking notes, but the remote for the whole night.......can I have a scotch or beer to help?We saw a commercial for a show/special coming on next week and she said "oh, that might be interesting" something I would not care to watch and on a Monday (Bears and Chargers) thankfully this is a game I can miss. I may have to use the trick rwsem mentioned above. Turn the game on and a little into it go 'hey, isn;t that show on you wanted to watch?' and turn to it.
You are progressing well Grasshopper
To the paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers:
if you find one...what's your plan?
Dans Club
March 2, 2008
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Kaseyart said
HAHAHA I'm taking notes, but the remote for the whole night.......can I have a scotch or beer to help?We saw a commercial for a show/special coming on next week and she said "oh, that might be interesting" something I would not care to watch and on a Monday (Bears and Chargers) thankfully this is a game I can miss. I may have to use the trick rwsem mentioned above. Turn the game on and a little into it go 'hey, isn;t that show on you wanted to watch?' and turn to it.
No scotch or beer. This will require a bottle of a delightful boutique Chardonnay that you just happened to have chilled.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman "Were is the Self Help Section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
George Carlin
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